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lauramariemusic.com - @lauramariemusic - lalaontube
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1) Goodbye For Now - Jenny Katz. Strong, focused lyrics. You have something to say and it comes across clearly. Nice feeling of change moving to the chorus and to the bridge. Excellent build up to the outro. Love the use of "going, going, gone". Really well done!
2) The Dream Is Winding Down - Governing Dynamics. "Grasping for the feeling just before the feeling dies" Nice imagery! Nice build up to the chorus. The grammar in the chorus throws me a little if I'm hearing it correctly "So long away" and "You've went far enough". That's what I'm hearing. If that is what you are saying, the grammar will definitely put people off. "You're so long ago" or "So far away" may sound too ordinary but they aren't as distracting. And "you've gone far enough" would be the way to put that second line. Song structure is good. Good use of imagery.
3) Tired Of Counting Down - Bubba And The Amiable Kraken. Good song structure. Rhyme scheme was clear but, at times, felt forced to make the rhyme rather than fit a central idea. There seemed to be a theme of time but then also the theme of this "finding you" that seemed disconnected from the rest of the song. Still the style and sound was very nice and satisfying, reminiscent of the Steve Miller Band. Classic sound. It could be very sing-a-long-able and could "hit home" more if the central idea was more focused. Loved the easy going vocals and sweet backing vox.
4) 4-3-2-1 - Zoe Gray. Clever and sweet. The 4-3-2-1 gives it a sing-a-long-able quality but the rest of the chorus doesn't because each chorus changes at the end. That's not a bad thing at all. It's simply a choice but, it's something to consider if you're pushing for a sing-a-long song (Ex: When I'm gone-Anna Kendrick). Another thing to consider is that the verse and chorus have the same rhyme scheme and melody so there's not a big distinction between verse and chorus (other than lyrically)and that takes power away from the chorus. The melody, however, is quite pleasant and memorable. Lovely voice.
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Countdown To Nothing (Shadow) - Rob from Amersfoort. "Crazy business man running for President...ignorance is bliss" very engaging line! A timely commentary on the current state of affairs. Nice touch with the "ticking" in the beginning.
Off The Grid - Brian Gray. Has a quirky Ben Folds feel that I love. The apocalypse subject matter is unique and original. Good chorus! Favorite lines in the song: "Sidestep the impending apocalypse", "Time to do the things I never did", "Other people suck". Though, I think the lyrics in the first part of the second verse could have ended stronger. The first verse set it up very nicely. Then, 'per' and 'were' paired nicely in the rhyme scheme but "that were" wasn't as satisfying an end to that part of the verse because it wasn't as clever as the verse that came before. Just something to consider. Well done!
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